一知道在哪儿，世界就变得像一张地图那么小了；不知道在哪儿，感觉世界才广阔呢。

Once you know where you are, the world shrinks to the size of a map; when you don't know where you are, that's when you experience the vastness of the world.

I’ve been very tempted to set a list of rules for my team to follow. The temptation is especially strong in our frenetic startup environment where we move fast while trying not to break so many things.

But should I?

To find my answer, I went for a run. Running is extremely boring. So boring that my mind always unlocks an answer for me after.

I realised that there is no point in setting rules. People just end up breaking them. And smart people would soon find them tiresome. Things also change so quickly that I have no time to update this hypothetical rulebook.

The answer: Habits always trump rules. 

A rule: I tell myself that I must wake up to run on Saturday mornings.
A habit: Every Saturday at 7am, I go for a 8km run with my friend.

The idea is to help my team form habits, so that one day they can do things well, rule-free and effortlessly - did it when they don’t even know how they did it.

By the way, the habit of running every Saturday at 7am for 8km with my friend is a real example.  And I don't know anymore how I do it.

Because a Product Manager’s impact is ill-defined, we end up being judged for the products we ship. And by extension we start thinking that Product Managers should be evaluated by the solutions we propose.

But that’s missing the point.

Thoroughly understanding and defining the problem we’re trying to solve is far more important than producing a good solution.  Rather than prescribe our solution, we should articulate the problem extremely clearly, then rally our larger teams to synthesize the solution together, iteratively.  After all, Product Managers are Jack of all trades, not the Master of one.

I see this daily because I manage a team of PMs in a rapidly growing company. Short turnarounds and each PM going deeper into a feature group becomes our excuses for losing sight of the wider problems. It is so tempting to parade a quick solution instead of saying that we don’t know yet and we’re still exploring the problem space.

So it is incredibly helpful to always ask yourself as if it is Day 1 - what exactly is this problem we’re solving here?  If we can’t agree on the problem, we’ll never agree on the solution.

Until six months ago, I stood firmly on the other side of the divide, believing that yoga is not for guys - and therefore definitely not for me. I resisted using the common defence mechanism that yoga is at the same time too light a workout and too serious about stretching.

Even now, practising yoga as a guy continues to be a conversation killer. When someone asks if I went to the gym, my reply that I just finished a yoga class typically invites silence or a polite but contorted smile. And once, a female colleague responded with "I prefer to take part in macho sports."

I'm glad I got past worrying about what others think. Try this as a guy: walk into a class full of ladies wearing tights, receive their curious glances, then proceed to be the most inflexible person in class. In the case of inexperienced instructors, add a situation where the teacher gets surprised by someone as stiff as you.

I'm glad I realised the secret to getting good - dropping the competitive mindset against others but pushing my own limits while being comfortable in my own skin.

I was twelve when I first received the advice that "loving what you do is more important than doing what you love." Back then, I dismissed that suggestion as coming from someone who is old and cynical. I thought I should only pursue what I love, and skip what I don't. Now I see it as important for me to not avoid doing what I don't love yet. 

With yoga, the initial dislike of the discomfort gave way to a maturity in dealing with the discomfort. Everything else in life - work, personal relationships - might benefit from the same. Slowly but surely, I got better. A pose I thought I couldn't deal with has recently become effortless.

It brings to mind the idea that "it is easy for you but it is hard for me." A lot of times we defensively dismiss someone's effortless ability as something we cannot achieve. But maybe it is because we never worked for it.

I'm thankful that I've more or less made yoga a ritual for myself now, practising at least every other day.  It has given me calm and focus in a job that requires me to be composed and to have a clear mind.  More importantly, it keeps me sane and fresh despite being desk bound for too many hours.

Two random sentences from my instructors come to mind:

• “If you can’t do it slow, you can’t do it fast."
  My instructor was trying to tell me that I wouldn't be able to launch into a crow pose or headstand quickly if I cannot manage to do it extremely slowly. It really reminded me that the path to being really good at something involves lots of relentless practice, persistence and being honest to myself.
  
  
• “Loud noises don’t scare you when you’re relaxed."
  Something had collapsed in the room when our eyes were closed in meditation. Yet no one had any significant reaction. It makes me realise that the way to navigate tough options in life and work is to be relaxed about it.  It doesn't mean you don't care or you are not invested in the outcomes.  It simply means you're able to create a better outcome.

I never thought I’d write a love letter to yoga, and the old me might have been surprised at the new me. But I'm glad to say that yoga is saving my life.  And yes - hello from the other side.

The tablecloth was plastic, and so were the chairs. In fact, the chairs are the type of stools you would find at street food stalls - red, blue and generally ugly. The menu board for coffee was sparse.

The cake display was the opposite. Perfectly shaped macarons and artfully composed Mont Blancs were lined next to classic tarts and pots of crème brûlée. And once I picked my cake (Alhambra Torte - 70% chocolate, hazelnut cake soaked with coffee-rum syrup and filled with chocolate ganache), an extensive coffee menu appeared. But again, the look of the menu - home-printed sheets of flimsy paper in an equally shoddy plastic file - didn't seem so promising.

In the end, I spent my afternoon at the siphon-brewed coffee cafe listening to three owners/employees share their views. Here's what I learned:

1. Give coffee time. Coffee is an agricultural product. We tend to forget this because unlike say wine, coffee is regarded as a grab-and-go beverage. The regret is that certain coffee flavours only open up after the coffee cools.
2. Give black coffee a chance. We associate black coffee with being bitter and sour, and so we hide those tastes in milk and sugar. But with the right preparation, black coffee can delicious without sugar and milk.
   
3. Don't impose your own views. The cafe specialises in siphon-brewed coffee, but willingly serves espressos, lattes and cappuccinos when customers order them. The last thing they want is to forcefully exert their views.
4. Put yourself in the shoes of the customers. Even within black coffee, they are mindful that everyone comes in with certain preconceptions. Out of the profile of bitterness, sweetness, aroma and sourness, beginners always shun bitter and sour. The cafe staff start by finding a bean which the customer would be comfortable with, then slowly bring them on a journey of discovery.
5. Defaults are powerful. They understand that default behaviours are powerful. Customers come in used to milky Starbucks. Customers seek out fresh spots, new trends. An unchanging, black coffee cafe like theirs can come across as boring, so they take efforts to explain their philosophy. 
6. Handmade = unique. How can Paris support so many bakeries and patisseries? Because something handmade is unique. Each bakery and patisserie can find their own niche and supporters. 
   
7. Open a cafe to express yourself, not to make money. They realised that many young people take short-cuts like franchising, copying existing concepts or resort to pointless frills (selfie printed on your coffee) to try to make a quick buck. Yet the sustainable way to run a cafe business is to express what makes your special. In that way you cultivate regulars, and regulars are the people who keep your business going after the opening buzz wears off.
8. Don't worry. In their years of running the cafe, they've been through tough times, but they thought of times of slow business as time when they had time to improve themselves. When 2 of 10 customers criticised their cakes, instead of a knee-jerk reaction to suit their taste (and potentially losing the other 8 customers), they thought long and hard whether they should even change their recipe.
   
9. Locals don't appreciate them yet. They say most Penang residents, unlike the more global-minded people from Singapore and Kuala Lumpur, still think of their cafe as an oddball, asking them why they don't bother with their decor.
   
10. An ugly cafe makes good coffee. They replied that if the decor is the selling point, they would be distracted into obsessing with the upkeep of their furniture. Instead, they want themselves, and their customers, to always focus on the coffee and the cakes. No sandwiches, no Eggs Benedict.
    

Sou Fujimoto is a young architect born in Hokkaido, based in Tokyo, famous for his 2013 Serpentine Pavilion and permeable private houses and currently working on competition projects his firm won in Paris, Budapest, Taichung, among other locations.

How successful will you be in your 50s? When you’re younger, you might look to older alumni from your university to glimpse into your future.

One difference between working for a big company and at your own startup is the direction in which resources flow. Employees pinch from a big company but donate to a startup. In a corporate environment, you probably would not feel guilty printing a personal document in the office. At your startup, you might be bringing snacks from home to feed your team.

On paper, my educational degrees are in Economics and Revenue Management. Yet I was only one or two credits away from also being a Psychology major. Rather than gain the extra qualification with the mandated coursework, I decided to select other courses that would challenge me to grow more.

But if I were to sum up my education from institutions, work and life, I’d describe it as understanding human behaviour. So, in one word - psychology.

Many confuse ‘psychology’ with ‘psychiatry’ (the applied, physician variation) or even worse - perceive psychology as the dark art of controlling others’ mindsets.

Over the years, one of the most important differences I have learned is to hold the mindset of 'influence' rather than the mindset of ‘control.’

With a control mindset, we attempt to dictate the outcome by directing others. When they do not abide with our instructions, both parties become emotional. Our emotions make us lose sight of our goal. In the chaos, the results deviate from our desires.

When we are in an influence mindset, we recognise that whether and how others can be persuaded is the path to the outcome we want. We take logical steps to uncover how they think and calmly navigate towards our goal.

The control mindset is common. It damages our everyday relationships at work and with friends and family.

For example, your Mom is riding shotgun as a passenger in the car your Dad is driving, and she tries to specify how he should drive. Your boss mandates a process contrary to your opinions. Or a mobile app you don’t quite like directs you to rate it five stars.

This ties in with how we typically evaluate situations from our own perspectives, inside-out, rather than outside-in. Even when it involves others making decisions for themselves (the most critical time to think from their angle).

The next time you are annoyed with someone, pause to see if it is because you wish to exert control. Loosen your grip. Walk in their footsteps and you will end up leading the way.

Fabian has spoken to hundreds on topics spanning entrepreneurship, community-building, product management, design, pricing and travel. With insights into the psychology behind engaging users and the evolution of live experiences, he provokes discussions around the role you and your organisation play in the future of online-offline interaction.

Gallery:

Developing tech products and building a community around it:

• Jan 2015 Trending SG, Speaker - 9 tips for event marketing, event spaces and event tools
• Dec 2014 Across the Border, Speaker - Communities across borders
• Nov 2014 Google GDays Georgetown Penang, Speaker - Community: at the heart of technology
• Apr 2014 MIT Technology that Matters, Speaker - Growing Startups Across Geographies
• Mar 2014 Hackers and Painters, Speaker - Dogfooding: a Product Manager’s best friend

The stories behind starting architecture walks in Singapore:

• Mar 2015 PechaKucha Night Singapore x Singapore Design Week Speaker
  
• Jan 2015 Idea Nation 聚意堂, Speaker - Magical spaces in Singapore 新加坡的奇幻建筑之旅
• Nov 2014 TEDxYouth@Singapore, Speaker - Travel without leaving home
• Oct 2014 Archifest: Crowded powered by PechaKucha, Speaker - The art of noticing

More:

• Feb 2011 Blink Blank, Speaker - The Price is Right: Ticket Pricing and Human Behavior from the Airlines’ Perspective
• Oct 2010 Barcamp 6 Singapore, 7 things I learned from having a beer (and my 90 beer caps collection)

A week ago, I was featured on The Guardian for my side-project Architecture Walks Singapore. The article gave me the opportunity to thank ten design places that inspire me. Naturally, being interviewed was a joy.

Around the same time, the organiser of an event that brings professionals across various industries and nationalities invited me speak. I thought it was a great opportunity for me to learn from participants knowledgeable in other fields - I did not hesitate in saying yes.

Then I realised the event venue was a restaurant that serves Shark's Fin soup.

Things are so easy-going when your personal views and professional activities are aligned. But what happens why they are not? Would declaring 'views expressed are my own' sufficiently separate personal opinions and company policy? With everyone given the tools to express ourselves today, everyone has become a public figure of sorts and a representative of our organisation. No one would quite care if you have already made the 'this is my personal opinion' disclaimer.

Do you then silence your private thoughts to protect the organisation's interests?

Two experiences I had recently in a purely personal environment taught me the answer.

During the Hong Kong Umbrella Movement, one of my friends shared a photograph of students repurposing plastic bottles into masks to shield themselves against the tear gas used by the police. One commentator, probably thinking of the Great Pacific garbage patch, stated harshly that "plastic has no place in our world." That comment reminded me to take a step back and understand the bigger picture. Otherwise I might make harsh comments that fail to see the good side of things.

And I was mindlessly scrolling down my Instagram when I saw a friend posting happy pictures of seeing a Killer Whale in a theme park. My knee-jerk reaction was almost to comment 'Haven't you watched Blackfish??' 

It reminds me of the lyrics from John Mayer's song 'Belief'

Is there anyone who ever remembers
changing their mind from the paint on a sign?
Is there anyone who really recalls
ever breaking rank at all
for something someone yelled real loud one time?

Ultimately it is not about the conflict between your private view and company's interest. It is about what your goal is, and how you go about achieving it. Too many people fight for what is 'right' without care for collateral damage, and without trying to understand why people do what they do.

I am still going to speak at that event, and I would not request for a venue change, especially after I realised that the organiser also owns the venue. I have not thought about how exactly to effect change in this case, but at least I know that boycotting the event, the venue or the organiser is not the way to go.

-----

Read next: How to say what you mean to say

Photo from Flickr / xanboozled

1. Explain what you do
   When people look at my business card, they are impressed because the title "General Manager" sounds important, but they often follow with the question "so what do you do?"
   
   I have learned to explain to everyone - customers, friends, my team - what exactly my role is. I have realised that above all, my role is to make sure the entire team is firing on all cylinders.
   
   
2. Remind everyone why we're doing what we're doing
   It is easy to get lost in the execution when you're hacking away at it day-to-day. I get my team to pull back and zoom out now and then to remind ourselves of the higher goals we're heading towards.
   
   
3. Manage by influence, not by authority
   You can never and should never try to control the people who work for you. You'll never have enough time, and you can't earn their respect. Everyone has a different style, so exerting your authority backfires.
   
   Instead, I try to set clear expectations so my team wouldn't have to second-guess what success looks like or what's in my mind. They then also feel empowered to make informed decisions without having to consult me.
   
   
4. Don't be the bottleneck
   I have learned to always share not just what to do but also how to do it and even more importantly - why. The point really is to let everyone do their jobs and remove obstacles, including myself.
   
   And in small ways: if they need a document signed, do it immediately because you're likely to forget otherwise, and become a bottleneck.
   
   
5. Be approachable to a fault
   Regardless of how many times you say an organisation is flat and hierarchy-free, there is still an inbuilt sense of boundaries, especially in Singapore.
   
   I have learned how important it is to encourage my team to share their minds openly with me, including telling me how to be better. Even then, I think they hesitate.
   
   
6. Roll up your sleeves
   The buck stops at you.  Being a General Manager is about making sure that even the most unsexy operations keep moving on.
   
   
7. Meet the standards you set
   It is easy to set high standards, like punctuality. It is harder to ensure you don't break your own rules.
   
   Even in the other directions, like working flexible hours and locations, you have to take the lead because otherwise no one would dare to do it.
   
   
8. Gain visibility, but be yourself
   I'm an introvert, and prefer not to be in a room of strangers. Yet it is important to gain visibility for your product via your own profile. But just remember to do it your own way, and be yourself while doing it.
   
   
9. Be proud, but be humble about your product
   Share the strengths of your product proudly, but be like a piñata when people bash your offering - hand them a smile and some candy, and learn how to make things better.
   
   
10. People first, always
    I'm only as good as my team. I try to make sure they're happy with their jobs, are able to see personal growth ahead of them and are motivated. Celebrate even the small successes, and give them credit instead of fighting with them for it.

And of course, easier said than done.

This blog post was written in 20 minutes. Again I'm trying to convince myself to write more, and it seems like the best way is to tell myself it doesn't take much time.

The piñata analogy is from Get Satisfaction.

Read next: How to say what you mean to say

The db Bistro burger at the Marina Bay Sands Singapore: sirloin patty, stuffed with red-wine braised short ribs and as a statement - foie gras, held by sturdy bamboo picks between a toasted parmesan bun. Sinful enough for a last meal, and therefore, dying for a wine pairing.

Since that burger is built for making the news, I can't imagine any table not ordering at least one burger. If my memory serves me right, all five at us couldn't help but order that same burger. Hey, makes the job easy for the waiter. And also makes my usual task of selecting the wine easier - theoretically.

Beef - clearly a red wine. And with the onslaught of fattiness, saltiness and savoury from the burger, a wine intense enough to stand up against it, possibly a Cabernet Sauvignon, or a blend that has Cab, like a Bordeaux. That is where the price constraint kicks in. My friends love me, but they would kill me if I made them split the bill for any wine priced far north of $100. And supposedly restaurants mark up Bordeaux, Cabernet Sauvignon and Chardonnay the most because diners recognise them the most.

It didn't help that the wine list ran hundreds of labels long, and there were wines by-the-glass that cost more than wines by-the-bottle at white tablecloth restaurants elsewhere.

I would usually ask the sommelier for recommendations. I generally don't dine at expensive places, and some like me would have the misconception that the sommelier is their enemy. They imagine that dude has a sales target, a commission and bottles of wine going over the hill.

But they forget the sommelier has a reputation, and that his aim might be to ensure you enjoy your first bottle enough to continue with a second, or to return to the restaurant. Moreover, margins are actually the thinnest at the high-end restaurants. Restaurants can only mark up expensive wine so much before the diners balk.

And the sommelier-is-my-enemy camp forgets they can choose how the interaction goes. For example: ask the sommelier what wine the chef braises the short ribs with. That helps you select your wine.

Better to seek some expert advice, then to make your decision, than to order blind and end up with wine you don't like (and still pay for it).

All that said, I don't think I asked the sommelier that evening. Because I had spotted an ideal candidate - a Malbec from a Catena family owned vineyard in Argentina. I remember a gorgeous Tahuan Malbec by Ernesto Catena.

As a more obscure grape varietal, the price was right. The other good thing about ordering underdogs is that the sommelier couldn't have put the more obscure bottles in the list unless he or she loved it.

After that evening, at least one of my friends loved the Malbec enough to make the effort to find out who distributes it. He also discovered that the mark-up at db Bistro (priced at $100) was one time more than it retails for (priced at $50). Not bad considering most casual places sell supermarket bottles that can be bought for $15+ for $50+ (that's more than 3x).

To be honest, if you ask me for the exact flavour profile of the wine or the burger, I can't quite remember. I just remember lots of laughter, the inky dark purple, almost black Malbec staining our teeth, swirling the wines like we thought the experts would, inhaling deeply the fruity smells, letting each sip linger since we don't pay so much for wine every day, having difficulty holding the burger up, warm and comfortable service from the team, and for me - wondering why on earth the Catena family keeps putting pyramids on their wine labels.

If you haven't been to db Bistro, I would recommend striking that original burger off your bucket list, and having a Malbec with it. And bring friends - they are the best wine pairing or burger condiment you could ask for.

I'm insanely jealous of Taipei because they have 24-hour bookstores. The last time I visited, I took a red-eye flight and headed straight to an Eslite to gorge on books. Even though I had my luggage with me, I still bought five books.

I'm starving in Singapore because there isn't a Chinese language version of Books Actually. I used to think that Bras Basah Complex, known colloquially as "City of Books 书城" and historically the home of Chinese bookstores would remain a haven.

But over the years the bookstores started stocking stationery and of course, assessment books, 10-year series, past-year examination papers aimed at helping students score at standardised tests.

The mothership of the stationery plus test books extravaganza is Popular Bookstore 大众书局. But since it has four floors at Bras Basah, I thought I had a chance at buying the rather popular novel Decoded 解密 by Mai Jia 麦家. 

Arguably readers have moved online. Me too - most of my reading is done on my Kindle app. But the question I feel for Singapore is that we don't even read, physical books or e-books. Let alone Chinese books. Chinese is probably regarded as a school subject best left behind after Secondary School or Junior College. Unless of course, that job opportunity requires you to brush it up.

I'm not the first to say this: that's why we Singaporeans are good at passing tests but terrible at things that require creativity and passion. In the end I had to contort myself through all the barriers Amazon China set up to get the book on my Kindle. Then I realised I have a new problem - no one to discuss the book with.

----

This was written in 10 minutes. I'm trying to write consistently, and it seems like the way to do that is to convince myself it doesn't take much time.

Being really skinny, I'm used to friends who haven't seen me in a while imagining that I got thinner even as I maintained the same weight. But tonight was the third time in one week that someone told me I lost weight, so I had to take her word. 

Today also happens to be the day I've been with Peatix (an online ticketing and registration service) for one year.

Don't get me wrong, I know my statistics - correlation does not imply causation. Still, I have been unintentionally skipping meals because I was at events. Somehow my body is unforgiving of debt. Once I've missed a meal, it doesn't properly acknowledge the food that comes after.

I'm working on making sure I don't skip meals. I stock snacks for me and my team. I also get as much sleep as I can. Getting a startup product somewhere is not a dash but an ultra-marathon.

Having no time to eat isn't the tough part of my startup job, much as I enjoy my food. 

The tough part is when organisers tell me issues I can't yet solve for them. I love the people who speak up - they really are your best customers. They come from a great place - from the concern they have for their ticket buyers. And actually they are also concerned for you, otherwise they will just walk away to a competitor. It is frustrating for them, and for me, to not be able to fix things in the short term. I'd like to think I'm not a proud person - even then the experience is very humbling.

Yet that might be what a startup is about. A startup is flawed because it is slightly ahead of the curve. It is trying to figure out what exactly it should be. It is a work-in-progress. The polished, finished products, those giants - they dominate today, on the flip side they are expiring more quickly.

My time in my previous start-up Viki has given me great perspective - how to keep the faith and push on with a product when it is still beta, how to empathise with all the parties from users to customer support to BD to marketing to dev who are all trying hard in their own ways, how to communicate so that people know where you are coming from. It also taught me to enjoy the ride.

My year with Peatix has been crazier then I signed up for when I came onboard to launch Peatix in Singapore. I am now the General Manager in Singapore, with the privilege of working with and nurturing three teammates with incredible attitude. I have met countless organisers who inspire me with what they are doing, whether they run a bookstore, organise meals for locals and migrant workers to mingle or put up plays. Sometimes when I look at what they're doing I am so moved. Really Singapore and the world has hope. I have been blessed by the openness and kindness of people. I've met people who just refuse to budge from the status quo. But more importantly I've met those who were willing to come with us to forge a new path.

I had thought I would write an epic, exhaustive blog post when I reach my one year mark, documenting one-by-one all the highlight events of the year that passed. But I'm grateful today that I think back and it has been a blur of laughter, friendship, changing my mind about things, failing then getting up again, knowing when to let go, being more spontaneous, and being thankful.

It recently dawned on me that because I go to events of all sorts these days - from a 'post-hardcore band's gig' to 'Japanese sit-down comedy' to 'exclusive launch party', not only do I get affirmation that Singapore is really exciting, I get glimpses into how a wide range of people live and what they love. I am so lucky.

My submission to the FiveFootWay "Magical Spaces" project in 2007, writing about the porch in my old Katong home.

---

"But what was in the space?"

"All things," the young man answered.

"Our dog under Pa's car, the dog bowl, Ah Ma's and Ma's plants competing all over the place, last year's Ang Paos still fluttering on them in shades of red, wind chimes, the overhang of our neighbour's mango tree, slippers that revealed who's home."

"When the car is out, Mimi the dog would stretch and run - fill up the space. Sometimes mangos fall ripe, sometimes they fall because mynahs pecked at them. Their fragrance fills up the night air, and bats - yes eventually I realized they were bats - swooped around. At least that's my memory of it."

"But what else? Surely there was more?"

"Small pools of wax, filed even smoother by shoes skating by. The wax from the Lantern Festival candles. Ma was always worried we would set the house on fire, so we were only allowed to play there. Mimi wouldn't come close to the flames. He's actually male, but we got him when he was already eleven - we didn't get to name him. When we wanted him to sound macho, we called him 'Ah Mi', like 'Army.' Haha, imagine that. He's a great dog. People always asked me what breed he was. You know, that's what people care about - the breed. I have endless stories but they just want to know the breed."

"I guess he's just another dog, Pavlovian and all. Even before I took Psychology 101, I tried to trick him into running towards me for a photo. Of course, tapping the dog bowl worked."

"How's he doing?"

"Well that must be more than ten years ago. I wonder how he liked to be under the car. We had a kennel that we never used it much. I hate to admit this, but sometimes I played those skipping games with my two sisters. A kid neighbour always spied on us jealously, and we nicknamed him "Pong Pong" after that buoyant fruit. We also gave the mynah with recurring baldness from fights a nickname that is too embarrassing to tell you. We would yell 'Pong Pong' and that confused Mimi. He would bark at us, thinking it is a game."

"You guys weren't kind - to neighbour or animals."

"Well I guess my compulsive e-mail checking habit came from running to the mailbox every half an hour to see if there is any new mail, although we would see the postman pause at our door when cycling by if there really was. But partly because my Ah Ma would randomly comment that she thinks she saw or heard the postman. Thinking back, perhaps she knew that we liked to dash to the mailbox. It probably took us just ten seconds, the dash - that was how small the space was."

We're all proud of Changi Airport, Chilli Crab and the Marina Bay Sands infinity pool. But it is actually the emerging, fragile or small-scale stuff that needs your support. Go on and help these homegrown Singaporean projects take off or keep going. These people inspire me!

• a.muse - wine inspired teas. Wine and tea are two complex drinks that reward endless exploration, and now even better: 2-in-1.
• Basheer - graphic books. My informal design education was from this store (and Page One). Being housed in atmospheric Bras Basah Complex helps.
• Books Actually - local books, community and cats. A bookstore that has been tirelessly championing local writers, organising endless events and showcasing their cute cats.
• Save Bukit Brown Cemetery - preserving our history, culture and nature. While politicians ask why some Singaporeans don't feel a sense of belonging, this group is telling us what we need to do.
• Bertha Harian (Breakfast Network) - If you prefer your news to provoke thoughts instead of thinking on your behalf.
• Candlenut Kitchen - Peranakan food, made from scratch. This restaurant has closed once, help prevent it from closing again.
• Creamier Ice Cream. For a non-farming country, Singapore has really delicious ice-cream. I could eat their seasalt-gula melaka everyday.
• Culturepush - highlighting Singapore creatives. Casts the spotlight on emerging art, culture and design in Singapore.
• Design Society - building a design community. In design or curious about it? Join their regularly run sessions.
• Edible Gardens - grow your own food in the city. Pushing the idea that we urbanites should have access to fresh, self-grown greens.
• Epigram Books - well-designed, thought-provoking Singapore titles. Each book is a work of art, and there is a lovely emphasis on comics too!
• The Fingersmith Letterpress - a quirky letterpress printing company. Great illustrations and sense of humour.
• A Good Citizen Obeys - Satirical artworks about Singapore. Sharing emotional and funny stories about the education and political systems in Singapore.
• Gryphon Tea Company - gourmet teas that bring you on a journey. Beautiful packaging, great taste. My go-to for an afternoon pick-up and gifts from Singapore.
• Haystakt - Crowdpriced creative goods. A platform that connects makers and supporters.
• Humans of Singapore - capturing stories of people in SIngapore. And reminding us that we're not so different after all.
• I Remember SG - A collection of memories. Where hoarders go exhibit their old stuff and non-hoarders go aww and woah.
• Independent Archive & Resource Center. A space that pushes the boundaries of art and culture in Singapore (and the limits of being a fire hazard).
• Jane's Walk - free, locally led walking tours. Reminding you that cities should be built for people and pedestrians, not cars.
• Jungle Beer - Singapore beer you'd love. Tiger is not quite Singapore beer.
• KOT Selections - Wine drinkers who happen to sell wine.
• Kult -.
• Lee Xin Li - 
• Little Drom Store - 
• Lowercase at LASALLE - 
• Mothership - 
• Naked Glory - assembled watches. Just love the old watches given new lives. 
• Organisation of Illustrators Council
• Peatix - discover emerging events. From theatre, music, parties, art to music, head here to find things to do! (Disclaimer: I'm part of Peatix).
• Pekoe & Imp - tea tasting reinvented. Re-growing a tea culture in a country that used to have a tea culture.
• Pink Noize -
• Rediscover.sg - 
• Roadside Stall - 
• Sonny Liew - comic artist / illustrator. My favourite. He is a genius.
• Stand Up for SG - 
• Taru Woodworks - 
• Tom's Palette - 
• Ujong - 
• Uncle Ahn T - 
• Urban Sketchers Singapore - 
• Uyii bags -
• Viddsee - Asian short films. A platform for short films from Asia, away from the distractions of Youtube.
• WahBanana - comedy Youtubers. Damn funny!
• Yao Yu - Typesetting.sg

Q, X, Z - If I were playing Scrabble, I'd have failed terribly. Help, anyone?

I'm passionately curious about life events that change trajectories. And I've had a few of those moments: studying at Penn and MIT in the United States and K.U. Leuven in Belgium, switching from a stable 'scholar' career track at an established firm (Singapore Airlines) to a (then) upstart company (Viki) that didn't even seem like it was based in the right location (Singapore, not San Francisco).

So even though I'm not a startup poster boy, I've been lucky to have the benefit of experience that would be useful to others starting down certain paths. That's why I give talks - it is my way of giving back. You can never start too early in giving back.

This post is essentially an invitation to organisers - if you're looking for a speaker, maybe I can help by being one. I'm particularly interested in speaking to these three groups 1) youth / students 2) people at a transition point of their lives 3) curious polymaths.

In the past, I've spoken about:

• Growing Startups across Geographies at MIT Tech That Matters Series 
  
• Singapore is a hub for startups and technology, but startups founded or based here cannot afford to restrict hiring or innovation to Singapore. Fabian shares personal and practical lessons learned from helping startups like Viki and Peatix grow across geographies.
  
• 7 things I learned from having a beer (and my 90 beer caps collection) at BarCamp Singapore 6
• Have you ever wondered why is it that twist off beer caps have not taken over the world?
• The Price is Right: Ticket Pricing and Human Behaviour from the Airlines’ Perspective at BlinkBlank #11
  
• Ever wonder how air ticket prices could vary so dramatically? How do airlines decide on pricing? In this talk, Fabian Lua won’t quite go so far as to “Break the Airlines Code”, but he will give some insight into airlines’ approaches to figuring out how much consumers are willing to pay to travel. He will also share some anecdotes that reveal the lengths people go to score cheap tickets and find loopholes in the system.
  
• As you can imagein, I got into some trouble giving this talk. 
• Dogfooding: A Product Manager's Best Friend at Hackers & Painters 
• Fabian Lua (@fabianlua) talks about when Product Managers need to "eat their own dog food".  The talk will cover lessons learned from building a set of new subtitling tools at Viki ("global TV site powered by a volunteer community of avid fans").  Fabian is currently the Community Growth Manager at Peatix and was Product Manager, Community at Viki.
  

Related experience I have:

• Guided architecture walks (my own project) and art walks in Tiong Bahru and Marina Bay (with OH! Open House)
• Co-organised talks at TEDxSingapore, TEDxMITClubSingapore, MIT Enterprise Forum Singapore, Backstage Pass at Peatix etc. Attended conferences like TED Global.
• Attended lots of talks series like Creative Mornings and Pecha Kucha Night.
• Essentially I'm familiar and comfortable with different formats, and have seen a bunch of great talks.

Other topics I can talk about:

• Hacking the wine list. About how to choose the best value wine from a restaurant menu. Because I prepared this talk halfway but never gave it.
• Being Singaporean in a tech startup. Because there just aren't enough Singaporeans venturing out to startups.
• Taking a scholarship or not, and career choices / transitions. Because I was a Singapore Airlines scholar, and jumped to a tech startup.
• Startup culture, and culture in startups, including working remote. This is a topic I'm passionate about.
• Becoming a product manager (or moving from being a product manager). Because that's what I've experienced.
• Stroke happening to someone close to you. Because my dad suffered from a sudden stroke.
• Architecture in Singapore. I'm not an architect, but I'm a fan.
  

The easiest way to start a conversation is to leave a comment below. I don't know where this will go, but I'm just putting it out there!

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Related post: Help others wholeheartedly (How I network)

I almost swore off wine after I tried it for the first time - in the form of an extremely tannic red. As my friend poured, he explained that wine represents the blood of Christ. That was Easter fourteen years ago.

I then swung momentarily to the other end of sweet-as-juice varieties.

The gateway wine for a reason
You can disdain Moscato as a wine for non-wine drinkers. But you can also regard Moscato as the gateway wine. The low alcohol content blesses it as an easy-drinking pair for meal sessions stretched over long conversations.

Great with spicy, fragrant Singapore food
The highly aromatic Moscato also stands up to Singapore food with strong smells. The sweetness fights off the spiciness - the same reason sugar is a standard condiment found on Thai tables. The slight fizz eases the burn off the tongue too.

Try Moscato with different food
But thankfully I then left that comfort zone of claiming "Brown Brothers Moscato" or "Ice Wine from DFS" as my wine of choice. I was ready for wine 'siu dai' (Singapore term for 'less sweet').

The first easy step is to vary the food you have while drinking Moscato. It becomes clear that Moscato's oily texture doesn't cut rich food - a cheesy ravioli or pork crackling becomes sickeningly fatty and sweet. Instead, match them with a glass of crisp, acidic Champagne or Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc like the readily available Cloudy Bay, Oyster Bay or Monkey Bay.

On the beach, by the pool
Step two is to vary where you drink your wine. At a picnic, rosé wines combine the refreshing qualities of white wine with the fruit flavours of red wine. Chill a light red like Gamay - and pair it with a summer day. 

Try Moscato's cousins
German Rieslings are proudly sweet. But there's a range of sweetness. Start off from the sweeter end (Auslese), then taper off to the drier side (Kabinett). Or perhaps Moscato d'Asti - the Italians instead of the usual Australians.

The best part of trying wines labeled in a language other than English? You make mistakes and end up on wonderful adventures.

Underdogs
I often play a game when I browse wine - I look for wines I don't quite understand. That eventually led me to the beautiful Torbreck's Roussanne Marsanne Viognier blend. Over a seafood dinner, no one quite knew why that wine tasted so good, or what that wine was - but everyone loved it.

That's also why I host a 'Underdogs' wine party, where you can't drink the most popular varietals. Brown Brothers Moscato is yummy, but there also is a whole other world out there.

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Read this next:
NTUC Fairprice Just Wine Club - Seems fail-safe, actually mostly a fail
Memberships always appear like good deals. The NTUC Fairprice wine club - $20 a year gets you 8% off wine at any Fairprice supermarket and invitations to wine tastings and pairing dinners. And I have Fairprice Finest within walking distance from home and work.

But supermarkets stock only wines...continue reading

My dad was a man of routine. Even when we had dozens of cable channels, he would watch just one. And naturally he had his favourite parking lot. It fulfilled several criteria, including being closest to his apartment block but slightly off the pathway. He wanted to minimise his walk but was also worried that a random passerby would damage his car.

When I started borrowing his car, I would sometimes get back too late to score that lot. It annoyed him. I felt a combination of guilt and also self-righteousness that life isn't about adjusting your schedule for a parking lot.

It is easy to mock a person of habit. Boring, predictable, unspontaneous. But I realised that is probably why some of his friends and customers loved him - the other name for boring is reliable.

My dad was a mechanic. After he suffered from a stroke, I took over maintaining the car. And I'm still struggling to find a workshop I can trust. (Unfortunately my sisters and I never got down to learning from my dad). At a car workshop, usually the customer knows so little relative to the mechanic - the information asymmetry means it has to be a relationship of trust. I supposed my dad never ripped people off, that's why he had customers who returned for more than twenty years. I once hit the side skirt of the car and brought it to my dad's friend's workshop - they refused to take any payment when they saw my dad's car.

Someone asked me recently why I'm so punctual when most Singaporeans are habitually late. That's because my dad never wanted people to wait for him, and trained us to do the same.

And for those who have asked me before how I can be so hardworking, I have to say that I don't think I work as hard as my parents did. His hands were often full of unattractive grease, but it was those coarse, blackened hands that helped raise us with honest hard work. My dad never had a fancy corner office, but he taught me much more with his favourite parking lot.

Rest in peace Pa.

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Image: "Hands" by Benjamin Lehman

Read this next:
In one stroke

Shocking, unacceptable but true: drivers in Singapore don't give way to ambulances! I was waiting for the elevator late at night on September 11, 2012 when I saw two paramedics wheeling a stretcher towards it - so I let them go first.  They thanked me..continued

A simple list of events I'm going for or would have gone for.

Talk by Victo Ngai, New York-based editorial illustrator (Thu 6th March, sold out)
Tiger Beer is best served really really cold, since it doesn't really taste of anything. To get us to buy, big beer brands flood us with advertising and grab the supermarket prime spots. 

It was near the entrance of the King Albert Park Cold Storage, right before Chinese New Year when I saw Victo Ngai's gorgeous work on the Tiger Beer cartons. She's in town to speak this Thursday. The event is sold out, but catch the rest of the series by the Organisation of Illustrators Council (OIC).  

[Did you know? The KAP Cold Storage is closing down. Even supermarkets pay the price of Singapore's progress.]

Jazz by the Beach (Fri 7th March, 8pm - late, Coastes on Sentosa, pay for food & drinks)
I enjoy Sentosa because most of the island (other than Resorts World) remains laid back. And listening to jazz, by Siloso beach is probably as close to a 'staycation' as a Friday night on Singapore can feel.

Sustainable Architecture Adventure (Fri 7th March 7pm + Sat 8th March 830am, Somerset + National Library. $15)
While rehearsing for my WOHA Architecture Walk late one night, I saw the National Library building from the Bugis+ rooftop, and finally fell in love with that building. I was originally annoyed that this cold steel and glass version replaced the old, warm red-bricked building. 

The Hub Singapore is screening a film on sustainable architecture, then guiding a walk - both include the National Library building. 

Late Harvest Shiraz tasting (Fri 7th March, until 10pm, PasarBella - off Bukit Timah Road)
The same way remixes and acoustic versions amplify the beauty of their original songs, adventurous use of grape varietals teach me new ways to appreciate the usual methods. I'm really excited about sparkling Shiraz, and Merchants Wine Cellar is pouring Late Harvest Shiraz this week at their PasarBella store.

I once overheard a Singaporean 'uncle' say of PasarBella, "Wah, no need to go overseas anymore!" This indoor market does have the vibe of Sydney or San Francisco on weekends. But what I like about it on weekday nights is how quiet and personal it feels.

Jungle Beer brewery tour (Sat 8th March, 630pm - 11pm, Admiralty - almost Johor Bahru, $40)
I don't think anyone really cares how beer is made. The real reason people go for brewery tours is to taste the freshest beers. Jungle Beer offers five hours of free flow of craft beer for $40. And they've recently updated their labels - looking beautiful!

Young Dreams (Norway) (Sun 9th March, 10pm, Esplanade)
Since I'm addicted to every single song of Kings of Convenience, I assumed every Nordic band must be good. And I dreamt of catching gigs at the Esplanade studios ever since I caught Au Revoir Simone there. So there, I bought tickets to Young Dreams.

(Speaking of Au Revoir Simone, they're going to be at Zouk).

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On Thursday 27th February (630pm), the wonderful people of Green Drinks Singapore are hosting "The future of food farming in Singapore" there. 

See and Be Seen takes place on 8th March, but registrations close this Friday. And if you're picking up your event pack on this Sunday before lunch, see you there!

7. Where books get reborn
I was a book hoarder before I got my Kindle / iPad mini. Still, I have too many books I've never read again. Hmm, which reminds me, where's my book on the Robert Mondavi wine family? But anyway, there's this great book swap that takes place over beer. I was really amazed I managed to pick up books I wanted, and people really wanted my old books. Economagics!  Their St. Patrick's Day version takes place on Saturday 8th March.

I'm not giving away my "Ten Sticks and One Rice" though, even if I've already read it four times.

(Image credits: Edible Gardens, KOT Selections, Culture Kitchen, See and Be Seen, Epigram Books, Artichoke)

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This is a personal post, and in case you don't know, I'm part of Peatix (event registration and online ticketing) and here's our list of Singapore events.

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Personal plug: I'll be speaking on Product Management at 12noon on 7th March Friday (Paypal Singapore, Millenia Tower).

"Fears unfaced become your limits." Robin Sharma

We start fearless as children, but as we mature, we shy away from what we are weak at. Over time, our weaknesses become our limits - out of habit.

Introverts are naturally more averse to networking than extroverts.  But I learned early on as an introvert that avoiding or even looking down on networking is a defence mechanism. We are just denying that networking can be meaningful and powerful - but secretly jealous.

Not that introversion can really be shed. I am still uncomfortable with small talk, and I still feel overextended when I dive into networking events where everyone else seems to already know each other. I still prefer one-on-one conversations and the company of close friends.

Instead, organisations and networking events should help everyone, including introverts, network. Even when an organisation tends to be born from a commonality, like the university you went to or the company you used to work for - its true power is in its diversity.

One big but simple lesson I learned from attending TED Global is - no one came here to be alone. The TED team remarked that there should be no reason you are standing there alone when someone else is pretending to look at a display. No one came here to look at a display either. That simple comment gave me courage to keep initiating conversations.

So I am a firm believer that the event format and organisation structure matter, more so than whether the people within are seasoned networkers or taking their tentative first steps. 

Improving the way networking is done at and between events is the exact topic at Peatix Singapore's next Backstage Pass event on Thursday. It might seem like I am being incredibly biased or sneaky to be writing this, but truth is that the three speakers we have are amazing and truly believe in what they are teaching. And it would be awkward for them to promote themselves, so here goes.

I knew Grace Clapham from TEDx circles four years ago, and everyone who meets her goes away impressed by her passion, sincerity and abilities. In addition to her own projects (like Change Ventur.es), she is always involved in organisations that give back to the community - Creative Mornings, TEDx and more. Like many of the wonderful speakers we have had before, she readily agreed to our invitation for Backstage Pass in spite of her crazy schedule. And she brought in Solonia Teodros, another amazing lady who co-founded community-driven initiatives including The Hawker Sessions and The Feast Worldwide Singapore.

I am very excited that Grace and Solonia will be conducting a hands-on session that teaches you what interactions to "force" to kick things off, and what activities to do to build trust and transfer knowledge.

We found Jonathan Kwan via Audacity 2014, and meeting him just once convinced me that he has lots to share on getting the strategic structure right for organisations so it can grow. One specific example is how it is easy to attract people who are not yet influential but are enthusiastic about your organisation to show up. But they actually want to network with the influential people who might not be as enthusiastic about showing up. Strategic issues like that make a difference to the networking experience, and he has lessons from building his university local alumni community to share.

Everything else is gravy, but look at this gravy: there are already many other interesting, friendly and accomplished people who have already confirmed their attendance. For $15 entry you also a tasting platter of Carribean food and rum punch from Lime House and $30 worth of Spotify credits.

What we learned at Peatix Singapore is that Singaporeans are really last-minute ticket buyers. People scramble right before the event asking us to save some space for them. But don't worry - we provide refunds if something really crops up, and you can always transfer your ticket.  (Get your Backstage Pass tickets here).

"Dogfooding" (i.e. using our own product, or in this case, also organising events) really teaches me what organisers experience. Any organiser would tell you it isn't easy, and is often a humbling experience. But they'll also tell you that the people who come and benefit keeps them going.

On that note, please also come to my talk about Product Management / Community on Friday, March 7th at the Paypal office (Millenia Tower, at lunchtime). Thank you Calvin Cheng (organiser of Hackers and Painters for inviting me).  I don't really like giving talks, but I realised it is an important way of sharing knowledge for the community to grow.

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Xiaomi, China's answer to Apple and Samsung, is supposed to debut in Singapore (and South East Asia) with their Redmi (Hongmi 红米 in Chinese) this Friday, 21st February.

The price of $169 is within reach (or Singaporeans have proven willing to spend beyond their means for mobile phones), and what's more - without any annoying contract!

With two days to go, it has been surprisingly quiet. Yes, the Xiaomi Singapore Facebook Page already has 7.6k fans, but this is the same company that claims "为发烧而生“, literally "Living on a feverish passion." And this is the company that Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak supposedly endorsed. The flash-sale of Hongmi in Taiwan saw 10,000 phones snapped up in less than 10 minutes. In Hong Kong it took only 36 seconds.

And Xiaomi / Hongmi are still trending in Hong Kong / Taiwan on Google. So why not Singapore? I'm curious to know. 

Xiaomi's China website is more like a Amazon, packed with text and images (the way the Chinese like it, although I'm sure more restrained than usual). Xiaomi's English site is definitely Apple - very minimal. The Hong Kong and Taiwan sites are in between. And Xiaomi Singapore is definitely more of the Apple look. 

And that makes sense - Xiaomi picked Singapore not only as the South East Asia launch and also the first English-speaking market. I'm sticking with my iPhone, but still very curious to see where this goes.

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A surprise of the "L" themed wine party Li Jen and I hosted near Valentine's Day was that the first two bottles were both Muscadet (a French white wine).

The first bottle, "Lobster & Shrimp" from the Barton & Guestier Pairing Collection, was part of the half dozen we bought before our NTUC Fairprice Just Wine Club membership expires. Based on the label, we wanted to serve it with a garlicky, umami-bomb dish of fried shell-on sakura prawn, like the version who had at Al Cicchetto. Al Cicchetto is a lovely tiny Taiwanese spot serving Italian small plates, in the Huashan 1914 Creative Park in Taipei. That was where Li Jen and I had dinner when we visited for TEDxTaipei in 2012 - and we returned in 2013. That dish captured the mood of those nights where we chatted about the wonderful talks we had listened to the whole day, in a cramped but utterly charming restaurant.

Unfortunately we couldn't get the right prawns, so the only seafood pairing was with herring. I realise now that I'm one of the only Singaporeans I know who enjoys herring. And herring didn't quite match that wine.

"You're a kind person - how can you eat animals?" My friend was completely earnest with his question.

I was stumped. I check all the boxes to be a Vegetarian:

1. Yes I believe that industrial meat production is cruel (and I care about animals)
2. I believe that a vegetarian diet is better for my body (and I care about my body)
3. I believe that a vegetarian diet is better for the environment (and I give a damn about the environment)
4. I can cook vegetarian and I know where to buy vegetarian food I like
5. My mother is a vegetarian and a hippie (and well, I care about my mom)

So at the start of 2014, I declared to myself I was going to be a Vegetarian on Wednesdays. I realised that even though I eat vegetarian food regularly, I didn't quite understand what the experience of being identified as a Vegetarian.

It turns out that once you tell people that you're a Vegetarian, you lose all other characteristics - they see you as if you tattooed VEGETARIAN on your forehead.  The conversations around you, especially near or during meal times, suddenly revolve solely around vegetarianism.  The good is that people are curious, sensitive and increasingly aware. And the discussions increase the awareness further.

The bad is - don't we have anything else to talk about?  Why is it such a big deal?

How does it feel like to be a Vegetarian? I guess I don't have the full answer as I'm still really struggling - it is way more convenient (and socially accepted in Singapore) to eat "everything / anything". I still like eating meat. The best I'm doing so far is to consciously reduce the amount of meat I eat, veto going for meat buffets - or at least opt out.

I guess being a Vegetarian feels like being part of any other group that is not the default, the mainstream or the dominant. As a tall, young, "free thinker", Chinese, straight, omnivorous, white-collar male in Singapore, being a Vegetarian, even for a day, reminds me that life is often so easy for me.

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I rented a simultaneous translation headset for this 8 hour play in Chinese, out of worry that I wouldn't be able to keep up with the language. And I thought I might become bored.  "A Dream Like A Dream (如梦之梦)" turned out to be the best performance my wife and I have ever seen - and we didn't ever need the headset.

The play is classified as "Chinese" but that's like calling Oxford-born, Japan-residing writer Pico Iyer "Indian".  Key scenes take place in a tiny apartment in Paris, a Chateau in Normandy, a train on its way to the UK and a hospital ward in Taipei.  In between, characters fly through time and space.

At these moments I'm particularly grateful to my secondary school education in Chinese and specifically in Chinese music. During our insecure high school days, being part of the Chinese Orchestra was terribly uncool - not only was the music outdated, China was, after all,the place our families left, for a better life in Singapore. My education gave me the courage to appreciate things without caring for whether they are considered cool.

But sometimes I wish I went deeper. I'm catching Singapore Chinese Orchestra's performance "Dream of the Red Mansion Suite" in two weeks, and realise that although I know the songs by heart, I barely know the novel well.  Almost like not knowing the details of Romeo and Juliet.

I'm also incredibly curious where China is headed. Other than reading external voices of the Economist, New Yorker and Guardian, I try to catch a glimpse based on what's popular in China.  Reading the trashy bestseller "Tiny Times" and watching "I am a Singer."  But maybe it is time for a trip to China, after 16 years.  When I was last in Beijing, it was still filled with bicycles.

Memberships always appear like good deals. The NTUC Fairprice wine club - $20 a year gets you 8% off wine at any Fairprice supermarket and invitations to wine tastings and pairing dinners. And I have Fairprice Finest within walking distance from home and work.

But supermarkets stock only wines from the giant corporates. Jacob's Creek, Wolf Blass, Penfolds, Banrock Station, Hardys, Lindemans, Wyndham Estate - safe and boring wines.

I tried it anyway.  No surprise - the wine club is poor value for buying everyday bottles. Put another way, paying $20 for 8% discount means discounts start only after $250.  With so many alternatives, how many of us want to be tied to one place? The same brands are stocked at Duty-Free, while Wine Connection offers cheap Chileans and Australians too.

Doesn't help that the wine tastings are almost as expensive for members as non-members.

Not everything is bad though:

• The bottles are in good condition - they were stored / transported with care, unlike Denise / Straits Wine
• Some of the branches, particularly the Finest versions, have wine sections large enough to include smaller vineyards
• As the dominant supermarket chain here, Fairprice can offer deep, loss-leading discounts

To make myself feel like I made better use of my card (ugh, another classic pitfall of memberships), I bought half a dozen bottles today.

One of the gems I returned to buy is the Ashbrook Estate Cabernet Merlot 2008 ($26 SGD after discounts). There are claims that Margaret River is similar in climate to Bordeaux, and this claret is the classic blend of Cabernet Sauvignon - Merlot - Cabernet Franc - Petit Verdot.  Being able to buy a ready-to-drink 2008 vintage off the shelf is a joy.  Most being sold are 2012s - way too young to be drunk. And I'm way too lazy to stash away.

This bottle is worth cellaring, but there's already plenty of bouquet to smell, layers of berries to taste and structure structure that lingers for just long enough.  

It makes me think of hosting a wine and cheese party soon.

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Read this next:
L for Loire Valley, M for Muscadet
A surprise of the "L" themed wine party Li Jen and I hosted near Valentine's Day was that the first two bottles were both Muscadet (a French white wine).

The first bottle, "Lobster & Shrimp" from the Barton & Guestier Pairing Collection, continue reading...

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Suggested reading: Not Brown Brothers Moscato - Then What?

On its launch day, Facebook's news reader app Paper averaged 4.5 stars over almost 3,000 ratings - amazing results since Facebook has previously been consistently criticised for new features.

One reason is that Paper provides an additional option but doesn't replace an older feature or app version.  People scream (understandably) when they can't stick to their old ways. In this case, there's simply a new toy to play with.  The core Facebook app still works like it did yesterday.

I learned a lot about user reactions when rolling out the new Subtitle Editor and Segment Timer apps at Viki.  Even though the new apps were designed to be more intuitive and friendlier to beginners, we knew that tutorials were important.  We considered integrating tutorials into the apps, or splitting out a trial version to be an interactive tutorial.  In the end, because we didn't want to weigh down an already heavy app and wanted to launch + iterate faster, we used a video tutorial and contextual clues like tooltips, help modal windows and colours.

So I'm particularly impressed that Facebook had the time, resources and commitment to incorporate a truly interactive and contextual tutorial into the Paper app.  It isn't just the usual walkthrough when you launch the app for the first time (e.g. Gmail mobile app's).  Thinking that people will learn or bother learning from swiping through tutorial screens the first time they launch your app is like believing people read manuals before powering up their new gadgets.

People simply skip manuals.  They only return to it when they mess up.

So Paper's time and context dependent "coach marks" coupled with GPS-like voice instructions are excellent.  They even affirm you when you've completed the right action.

It is also a sign of humility - that the team behind it knows that even Facebook can't afford to lose users from frustration.  They had to make swiping the cover image lead to a different section (probably makes more money for Facebook) while doing more to make sure users understand that non-intuitive interaction / experience.  Observing my wife use my Paper app for the first time (the tutorial only showed me since it only shows once) indicates that the default expectation of swiping the cover image is that it moves you to the next story.

Read more »

My years at Singapore Airlines taught me that it is easy to either be a “yes man” or say what you mean to say, but too aggressively.

Managers who lack confidence love colleagues who agree with them - very humanly so.  In big corporations too many choose what is less painful (seek consensus, disagree behind the back) than what is right for the firm (challenge outdated beliefs of senior experienced people, accept alternative views professionally, not take it personally).

At the same time, frustrated upstart employees find it easy to protest, self-righteously.  I’ve walked out of a 50-people meeting because it was clearly so unproductive, sending a message - too bluntly.

I’ve since wondered where the balance is - both when managing and being managed.  Essentially, how to say what you mean to say?

This is even more critical when I moved to web startups, where speed and trust can make or break a product.

Heavily inspired by John Maeda’s “Four Rules" and the book "The Five Dysfunctions of a Team”, I’ve decided it is best for me to be forthright, but respectfully.  Not making someone look bad or feel insulted is important if you want that person to understand and internalise what you just said instead of rejecting it.  And see why you said it.  

Being honest is actually a form of respect, but only when you make it so - being honest is also an art.

Image: x1brett (Flickr)

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